


I can be good, I can be true

by keefling



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Gray-Asexuality, M/M, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Relationship Negotiation, Self-Worth Issues, Trans Male Character, consensual voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-16 07:47:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14807222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/keefling/pseuds/keefling
Summary: He could learn to enjoy it.  He could be good for Molly, and Molly would tell him that he was good.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this on a whim, trying to get some feelings out. It's a heavy one, folks. 
> 
> Caleb is a trans man in this fic, and I use feminine-coded words to describe his genitals.

Caleb’s heart pounded whenever Molly caught his eye.  He could not hold the tiefling’s gaze for more than a couple of seconds before he had to look away.  He was sure Molly could see him blush and the fact just made his face grow hotter. There were even times when Caleb had to leave the room to catch his breath, to stave off the panic that squeezed his chest and turned his stomach upside-down.  Molly was handsome and kind and he did not flirt with Caleb the way he did with the others, the way that felt shallow and insincere. There was something genuine in the way that the Molly looked at Caleb, and it was absolute torture.

One night, Molly had asked if he could kiss Caleb.  Caleb had answered by grabbing Molly by the shirt and sealing their lips together because gods, yes, Caleb’s body wanted that and it told Caleb that he wanted it, too.  Caleb’s body wanted Molly’s attention and Molly’s hands on his hips and Molly’s mouth on his neck.  His body wanted to pin Molly to the inside of his bedroom door and kiss him stupid and palm the hard cock in Molly’s trousers while they struggled to support each other’s weight.  Caleb’s body knew what it wanted, and Caleb eagerly obliged.

“What do you want from me tonight, darling?” Molly panted against Caleb’s cheek.  They were both gasping for breath after kissing their lips numb.

“You,” Caleb said, his words failing him, “I want you.”

“Can you be more specific, love?” Molly asked, his fingers crawling down Caleb’s back to grab his ass.  He bit Caleb’s neck playfully and growled, “I could eat you out, or you could suck my cock.  I’m not particularly picky about who’s on top, either.”

Caleb whimpered.  He could listen to Molly run his mouth about every filthy position he could imagine, but Molly’s cock was throbbing against Caleb’s hip and Caleb was leaking down his own thigh.  “All of that sounds wonderful,” he said.

Molly grinned and backed Caleb up against the bed.  Caleb fell backwards into a sitting position and Molly sank to his knees, licking his lips as he peered up at Caleb through half-lidded eyes.  Caleb reached for Molly’s horns and was rewarded with a groan when he traced the curve of a velvety horn, a sound that send tremors down Caleb’s spine.  His initial anxiety had faded or had at least been consumed by something else, something bigger, something hungry and ferocious.

Caleb was acutely aware of Molly’s every movement.  He lifted his hips off the bed without being asked to let Molly yank his trousers down.  His underclothes were wet and sticky when they were pulled away, exposing Caleb’s groin to the open air.  Caleb shivered, but the cool air between his legs was soon replaced by Molly’s hot breath.  Molly pressed light kisses in between Caleb’s thighs, on his pubic bone, everywhere except the place Caleb wanted it the most.

Caleb whined, and Molly grinned wickedly.  “May I?” he asked as if it were a question as simple as asking for a bite from someone’s plate.

“ _ Bitte, _ ” Caleb urged, moving his hand from Molly’s horn to gently tug his hair.  Molly purred at the sensation, and without another word he dove between Caleb’s legs and licked a vertical stripe up the center of Caleb’s pussy lips with the very tip of his tongue.  Caleb sucked in a gasp through his teeth and nearly jumped off the bed.

“Still okay?” Molly asked, his lip twitching while he tried to combat a creeping smirk.

“ _ Ja, _  keep going, please.”  Gods, Caleb did not expect to be so sensitive but it felt like all the blood in his body had suddenly rushed to his groin.  He spread his knees farther apart, encouraging Molly to continue.

When Molly licked him again, he established a pattern of licking upwards with the flat of his tongue and using the tip to tease him on the way down.  He wiggled his tongue between Caleb’s lips and found the slick entrance, pushing his tongue as far as it could reach. Whatever uncertain thoughts Caleb had before had fled and left behind only lust, the need for more of Molly’s tongue or fingers or cock or whatever it took to get Caleb off.  He rocked his hips, seeking more, more, more,  _ more— _

“More?” asked Molly, and Caleb had not realized he had spoken aloud until Molly’s tongue was gone.

“Use your fingers,” Caleb begged.  “ _ Bitte. _ ”

“Well,” Molly chuckled.  “Since you asked so nicely…”

Molly coated two fingers in Caleb’s natural lubricant and pushed both inside of him.  He alternated between thrusting in and out and curling his fingers into the patch of nerves just past the opening.  Caleb wailed with a hand clamped over his mouth; the sensation of being penetrated lit up his nerves like lightning striking a tree.

Caleb heard Molly laugh low in his throat and felt Molly’s lips close around his heavy, swollen clit.  When Molly sucked, Caleb lost his sense of balance and fell backwards onto the bed.  He arched his back and thrashed his head back and forth, trying his best not to howl as white-hot pleasure wracked his body.

“Molly,” Caleb choked out.  “I’m close!”

“Do you want to come, dear?” Molly teased, his voice nearly lost in the rushing of blood in Caleb’s ears.

“Gods, yes!” Caleb sobbed.  He was a mess.  He knew Molly could see that he was a mess.

“Deep breaths, Caleb.”  Molly’s soothing voice brought a part of Caleb back to himself.  He watched his own chest heave up and down and tried to slow his breathing, tried to breathe into his stomach instead.  “That’s a good boy,” Molly said, unaware of just how hard those simple words of praise hit Caleb.  Tears began to trickle down his face when Molly returned to fucking him with his tongue and fingers.

It only took a few more thrusts and a particularly powerful suck on his clit for Caleb to peak.  His muscles locked in place as he arched off the bed and his thighs shook as they clamped around Molly’s head.  He bit down on his sleeve to keep himself from screaming, but his own choked wail sounded deafening in his own ears.  His orgasm crested and crashed down on him in waves that dragged him under again and again and he thought he might drown right there with Molly’s head locked in place between his knees.

“Stop, Molly,” Caleb sobbed, scooting farther up onto the bed, away from Molly’s mouth.  “That’s enough, Molly, please.”

Molly raised his head, grinning with Caleb’s cum dripping down his chin.  He climbed atop the bed and lied down next to Caleb.  He gently stroked Caleb’s forearm and waited patiently for the wizard to regain his breath.  It felt like it took forever for Caleb’s heart to slow to a reasonable pace, and even when it did, Caleb felt like his lungs were two sizes too small.

“That was….that was incredible, Mollymauk,” Caleb whispered.  He was coming down from his high when a vague sense of guilt crept into his chest.  He was just tired, for sure.

“I take it you enjoyed yourself, then?” Molly asked with an earnest smile that Caleb loved.  Seeing it made his heart ache for a reason he could not place.

“ _ Ja. _  I would say that is an understatement, but  _ ja. _ ”  Caleb rolled onto his side, facing Molly.  He flashed a mischievous grin and brushed his fingertips over the bulge in Molly’s trousers.  “Your turn,” he said, sliding off the bed to kneel between Molly’s legs.

“Oh, you want to suck my cock?” Molly purred.  “I didn’t even have to ask.  What a good boy.”

Molly’s praise pleasantly prickled down the back of Caleb’s neck.  He nodded.  He wanted to be good, oh, he would do anything for Molly if he could be good.  Caleb swallowed hard.  “Should I have asked?”

“I give you permission either way, darling,” Molly said, sitting up, shrugging and stroking Caleb’s hair.  Molly’s claws on his scalp felt nice; Caleb was content to bask in the attention some more, but Molly had been aching in his trousers this whole time and Caleb did not want to make his partner wait any longer.  Caleb turned his full attention to Molly’s cock.  He nuzzled the hard length before untying the strings that held up Molly’s trousers, pulling down his waistband and letting his cock spring free.

Molly may have been an average length and Caleb may have seen Molly naked on more than one occasion, but up close, his dick looked huge.  Caleb eyed it up and down and from different angles, realizing that he probably looked strange flitting about from Molly’s point of view.  He pressed a tentative kiss to the head, testing how the salty mix of sweat and precum tasted on his tongue.  It was not great and neither was the texture, but maybe he was not in the right headspace to enjoy it yet.  Caleb opened his mouth and let the tip rest on his tongue, curiously exploring the ribbed underside.

Molly chuckled above him.  Caleb knew it was meant to be merely teasing, but he felt something acidic rise in the back of his throat.  If dread had a taste, this would be it.  Figuring that he would rather take Molly’s cock sooner than later, Caleb gathered as much spit on his lips as he could before wrapping them around the length before he and slowly, slowly took it in.  He heard the tiefling groan appreciatively above him, Molly’s hand still carding through Caleb’s hair.  Caleb focused on the touch—at least that felt good.  Caleb was good, and he wanted to make Molly feel good, too.  He lifted his head up and sunk down again, feeling like he might as well be taking the whole length into his mouth.

“Caleb.”

His jaw began to ache after only a few sucks and, gods, this was not anything like he had imagined.  He wanted to gag, wanted to spit out the salty, bitter taste.

“Caleb.”

Caleb felt a hand on his shoulder.  It was shaking him.  Molly was shaking him.  “Caleb! Stop for a minute, will you?”

Caleb let the cock drop from his mouth and shrunk into his shoulders.  “Sorry.  I am….I’m no good at this.”

“No, no.”  Molly shook his head.  “That’s not what I’m worried about.”

Caleb wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.  “Worried?”

“Yes.  That isn’t the face of a man who is enjoying himself.”

Caleb cringed and recoiled like he had been hit.  His legs were trembling beneath him and he was suddenly aware of his knees digging painfully into the uneven wooden floor.  Molly was no longer touching him, grounding him. He felt like he would sink through the floor at any moment.

“I want to make you feel good,” Caleb said, desperation clawing its way into his chest.  He had to do this, had to make Molly feel as good as Molly made him feel.  He gripped Molly’s knees and stared pleadingly into his eyes.  “Let me try again. I just need to get used to it.”

Caleb could learn to enjoy it.  He could be good for Molly, and Molly would tell him that he was good.  Caleb shifted uncomfortably and bent his head over Molly’s cock.  Tears welled up in his eyes when Molly pushed him back again.  “Molly, please,  _ bitte _ ,” he whimpered, cursing himself for falling apart at such an important moment.

“Absolutely not,” Molly said, definitively.  “Caleb, come sit on the bed, dear.”

Caleb pulled himself to his feet and did as he was told.  Molly reached out to touch his face, to brush his knuckles softly against Caleb’s cheek.  But Caleb, as much as he craved Molly’s touch, pulled away and scooted to the corner of the bed.

“Something’s wrong,” Molly deduced, looking at Caleb with kindness in his eyes and a loving expression that Caleb did not understand nor deserve.  “Won’t you tell me?”

“I want to be good for you, Mollymauk,” Caleb whispered.  He felt the first tear carve a path down his cheek and soon he was crying freely and hating every second of it.  His body shook with sobs that got stuck in his throat, and when he spoke again his mouth was bone dry. “I wanted you.  I have wanted to give myself to you, body and soul, if you would have me.  But I cannot do this, this stupidly simple thing for you—”

“Caleb, darling,” Molly interrupted, sounding absolutely devastated.  “I’m sorry, I never wanted to make you feel like—”

“ _ Nein! _   No, I do not want your pity, Mollymauk!” Caleb shouted hysterically.  “I am the one who is sorry. I am selfish. You should forget that this happened.  Forget everything.”

“I don’t want to forget,” Molly said, his voice wavering.  “I’ve already forgotten so much. I have wanted you since the day I met you, Caleb Widogast.  Whatever you are willing to give me, I will gladly take, but whatever you do not want to give, it is yours to keep.”

Caleb went silent for a moment.  Molly’s words sank into his heart and slowly, he felt the tight ball of anxiety dislodge in his chest.  He wanted to believe the things Molly was telling him.  He wanted to believe he was worthy.  He wanted to believe he was a good person.  But the truth was the he was not.

“I am a broken man,” Caleb stated flatly, his voice as empty as he felt inside.

Molly took one of Caleb’s hands in his own.  “I don’t know what you’re running from, and frankly, I don’t care unless you want to tell me.  I will stay by your side, or keep my distance.  Whatever you want, Caleb, just say the word.”

“I do not want you to go,” Caleb said, guiltily.  “But I do not deserve to be your lover.”

“Gods almighty, Caleb, It’s just sex!” Molly cried.  “I don’t know who put it into your head that sex makes a relationship, but let them rot.  I can’t just spirit my feelings for you away because you didn’t suck my dick.”

“Oh, gods,” Caleb shuddered, drawing his knees up to his chest and burying his head between them.  “I am such an idiot.  I am so, so sorry, Mollymauk.”

“You don’t have to apologize to me, Caleb.”  The kindness in Molly’s voice made Caleb’s heart ache all over again.  Softer, he said, “But you can if you want to.”

“Thank you,” Caleb said, muffled by his knees.  “I mean it, Molly.  Thank you.”

“I know you do, love,” Molly replied, patting Caleb on the back.  Molly tugged his pants up before lying down next to Caleb.  “Will you come to bed?  You look exhausted.”

“ _ Ja _ , I will.  It is my bed, after all.”  Caleb did not realize how tired he was until Molly suggested it.  He was sore, winded, and stressed beyond what words had to offer.  Although it felt like a weight had been lifted, Caleb just wanted to sleep, to shut off his mind for a bit.  Molly looked comfortable, stretched out on Caleb’s bed.  He would be difficult to move, even if Caleb wanted him to, which he absolutely did not.  Caleb stretched out on top of the covers and snuggled against Molly’s side.

“Can we talk more about this tomorrow?” Caleb asked, tucking his head under Molly’s chin.

“Absolutely,” Molly said, throwing an arm over Caleb’s hip.  “If this relationship is something we both want, then we will make it work.”

Caleb took a deep breath, filling his lungs with Molly’s scent and sighing happily as he reached over the tiefling and put out the bedside lamp.  The love he felt for Molly settled over his soul like a soft snowfall, the comforting presence of his partner sapping the tension from Caleb’s bones.

He was sure that he heard Mollymauk whisper, “You’re a good man, Caleb,” into the darkness before drifting off to sleep with the hope that maybe, someday he would be.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: description of scars

Caleb sat in bed with his back against the headboard and a book in his lap that had been boring him to death.  His mind itched with worry as the time for sleep approached.  It had been a particularly difficult week full of nightmares that stole from the five or six hours of peace that the day was kind enough to grant him.  He tried to focused on Molly who was kneeling on the floor of their room with his tarot deck spread in front of him.  Caleb had watched him shuffle and draw the cards dozens of times but he was still mystified by the tiefling’s nightly ritual. 

“I want to talk,” Caleb said.  The words spilled out of his mouth, accidental almost, like the splash of liquid from a tankard hitting the floor before he realized he had knocked it over. 

“Oh?”  Molly put the cards down at once and turned to look at Caleb.  The light from the room’s only lantern reflected off his horn jewelry that danced magnificently around his head. 

“About the other night,  _ ja. _  If you do not mind.”  Caleb felt guilty for interrupting but he feared that if he waited, he would lose the mental struggle with the part of himself that did not want to talk at all. 

“Of course I don’t mind, darling,” Molly said.  He stood and climbed onto the bed, folding his legs under him while facing Caleb. 

Caleb marked his place in the book with a piece of string and set it down on the bedside table.  

“I….I want to apologize, Mollymauk.” 

“Oh, Caleb, you don’t have to apologize for—”

“No.  Let me talk,” Caleb barked, flinching at his own inflection.  He loosely hugged his knees, unconsciously guarding himself.  “S-sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you.” 

Molly nodded silently; he understood. 

“I am afraid I gave you the impression that I was uninterested in being intimate with you.  You are a very desirable man, Mollymauk—hey, I saw that!” Caleb huffed when he saw Molly’s lips curve into a sly smile at the mention of his attractiveness. 

“Guilty as charged.”  Molly shrugged.  “Go on.” 

Caleb cleared his throat and reset his expression.  “I knew that I wanted you— _ want _ you—but I did not know how.  I was unable to communicate that to you at the….the other night.” 

“I was worried that I scared you,” Molly admitted.  “I never wanted to make you do anything that made you uncomfortable.” 

“You did not do anything wrong, Mollymauk.”  Caleb’s eyes fell, and he started picking at a loose thread on the blanket.  “I am just….poor at communicating, sometimes.” 

Molly smiled gently.  “Communication is not one of your strong points.”  He reached for Caleb’s hand on the bed, an offering of peace in exchange for the criticism.  Caleb upturned his palm and took Molly’s hand. 

“I would like to change that,” Caleb said.  He blushed and studied the faded pattern on the shabby blanket.  “I would like you to help me change that.” 

“How so?” Molly was leaning over, his face sliding into Caleb’s view. 

“Well, I thought maybe we could try again?”  Gods, when had Molly gotten so close?

“We’ll try again,” Molly echoed, giving his hand a firm squeeze.  “We’ll go slow this time.” 

“ _ Ja, _ I would like that,” Caleb said.  He finally met Molly’s eyes.  Caleb had played this conversation over and over in his mind, chasing every possible outcome to its inevitable disastrous end.  But here in the moment with Molly, he felt the cold hand of anxiety shrivel up and release its grip around his throat, allowing a pleasant warmth to pump through his arteries, warming his body from his tingling cheeks to the pit of his stomach. 

 

***

 

“Is this okay?” asked Molly, resting his hands on Caleb’s hips.   Caleb was sitting in his lap, both wearing undershirts and trousers.  Caleb answered by wrapping his arms loosely around Molly’s neck and resting their foreheads together. 

“Kiss me,” Caleb whispered against Molly’s lips.  The tiefling hummed appreciatively when they pressed their mouths together.  It was gentle but certainly not chaste; it was Caleb who flicked his tongue against Molly’s lips.  The slick heat of Molly’s powerful tongue when it slid inside Caleb’s mouth gave the man chills.  Caleb sucked on the tip and the guttural growl that followed instantly sent blood rushing down to Caleb’s groin.  He scolded the part of him that he wished he could control.   _ Not now.  Do not ruin this. _

Caleb gasped when he felt Molly’s fingers trailing up the back of his neck to cradle his head.  Molly drew back instantly, and Caleb whined. 

“Alright, love?” Molly asked. 

“Don’t stop kissing me,” Caleb ordered, and Molly obeyed. 

Their kissing grew sloppy and their breathing ragged.  Caleb, with his fists bunched in Molly’s shirt, panted heavily against Molly’s face until he finally ran out of oxygen.  He pulled back and stared slack-jawed at Molly’s lips, plump with blood and wet with spittle. 

“I think I like kissing you,” Caleb declared. 

“You think so?” Molly teased breathlessly.  “What else do you think you like?” 

Caleb hummed, pausing for a moment before tugging on the hem of Molly’s shirt. 

“I think I would like this gone,” Caleb said, lifting the fabric over Molly’s stomach.  Molly raised his arms to allow Caleb to pull the whole thing off and throw it aside.  He took Molly’s hands and returned them to his hips.  Caleb enjoyed the weight of them and the idea of being gently held in place made him feel secure.  Molly drew circles over the clothed skin with his nails, leaving goosebumps in their wake. 

Caleb was staring unashamedly at the divet between Molly’s collarbones, down his broad, scarred chest to his lithe, muscular torso.  Caleb thought about undressing him further, but an uneasy feeling kept his hands from reaching for Molly’s trousers.  Those bony hips and the thin line of hair that disappeared under Molly’s waistband were somehow hotter to Caleb than the full view.  It created a sense of mystery, although there was hardly anything left for the imagination after seeing Molly naked so many times before.  But Caleb allowed himself to enjoy it; it just felt right, and he hoped that was okay. 

“I don’t mind if you want to stare at me all night,” Molly said, breaking Caleb’s silent concentration.  “But you’re welcome to touch if you want to.” 

“Ah, thank you,” Caleb said.  Molly laughed softly, but Caleb had meant it—he needed permission to touch, and once it had been granted, he pressed one hand in the center of Molly’s chest. 

“You’re very warm,” Caleb observed. 

“It’s a tiefling thing,” Molly explained.  He took a moment to recline on the bed, stretching out like a cat in the sun, with Caleb still perched on his thighs. 

Caleb flattened his palm over Molly’s chest.  His pale hand stood out in stark contrast to the rich purple skin, made even darker by the dim light of the room.  He drew his hand down Molly’s chest and felt his fingers slide over the uneven lines of his scars.  He searched Molly’s face for any sign of disapproval and saw none; Molly’s eyes were half closed and his lips rested in a peaceful smile. 

“It doesn’t hurt,” Molly said.  His chest rumbled under Caleb’s palm. 

“I know,” Caleb answered.  He had told Molly the same thing the first time he had shown Molly his burn scars.  All that was left was the occasional itch and the phantom pain that usually subsided upon being touched. 

Caleb gave in to the urge to kiss Molly’s skin.  He started at the clavicle and kissed his way down Molly’s left breast.  He was pleased to find just how soft the raised, pale lines were beneath his lips, much unlike his own scars that left his marred skin rough to the touch.  He would not call Molly’s scars beautiful by comparison, but they were a part of the whole, a part of the body that Molly flaunted so confidently despite its imperfections.  A part of the body that Caleb felt selfish for keeping to himself. 

Molly’s pulse throbbed excitedly against Caleb’s lips, making the hair prickle on the back of Caleb’s neck.  He was so close to Molly’s lifeline, to the muscle that brought life to flesh and bone.  He ran his fingers over the taut muscles of Molly’s stomach and watched them ripple in response. 

“You’re ticklish, Mollymauk.”  Caleb smirked against his skin and dragged his nails over Molly’s stomach again.  The tiefling gasped and arched his back reflexively, showing off the bulge in his trousers.  Caleb froze, focused on the way Molly’s cock stretched the fabric and formed a little tent between his legs. 

“Ah, sorry about that,” Molly apologized.  He closed his legs to try and hide his erection. 

Caleb whimpered.  He was acutely aware of how quickly his body was responding to Molly’s arousal by the flood of head that rushed south.  Oh, gods, he wanted to know what Molly would look like under his hands, wanted to hear the array of sounds he would coax from Molly’s lips.  The walls of his mind were closing in on him, his thoughts becoming harder to process. 

“What are you thinking about?” Molly asked.  Caleb pried his eyes from Molly’s crotch and saw his soft expression tainted with worry. 

_ I do not deserve any of this, _ Caleb did not say.   _ You should run away from me and find someone who does.  _

Caleb tried to shake it off, tried to purge his mind of all thoughts.  Molly would not be here if he did not want to be.  Molly would not waste his time on someone he thought was unworthy.  Molly was not that type of person. 

“I want to know what you look like when you come,” Caleb said aloud, chomping down on his bottom lip once he had heard himself speak.  The words sounded foreign and ugly on his tongue, like he was butchering a new language. 

Molly’s eyes grew wide just for a moment.  Hopeful, perhaps.  Waiting for Caleb to let him down, probably. 

“Would you like to make me come?” Molly asked, way too gently for such a dirty question. 

“ _ Ja, _ I, um….I do not know,” Caleb admitted.  He did, maybe, but he was not sure that he wanted to bridge the gap it would take to get there. 

“That’s alright,” Molly said.  He propped himself up on one elbow and cupped Caleb’s cheek in his other hand.  “We can stop if you’d like.” 

“No,” Caleb said.  Fed up with his own indecisiveness, he snatched Molly’s hand away, pressed a kiss to his knuckles, and placed it between Molly’s legs.  “I want you to show me how you touch yourself.” 

Molly studied Caleb for a moment.  Caleb felt exposed, despite being more dressed than Molly was.  He was afraid Molly would say no, call it a night and put Caleb to bed like a child.  But Molly grinned instead, wicked and wide.  “You want to watch me jack off?” he said, and  _ fuck _ , Caleb knew his underclothes were soaked. 

Caleb licked his lips.  “I do,” he said.  “Please, show me.” 

Molly gripped his cock over the fabric and squeezed.  He was fully hard now, Caleb could tell. 

“Take it out,” Caleb said, suddenly impatient.  “Let me see you.” Molly freed his cock from his underclothes with only the head poking out of his trousers.  It rested on his belly, plump and flushed and shiny with precum.  Molly gathered saliva on his tongue and licked his palm, then dipped his fingers below his waistband.  He sighed as he began to stroke himself, smearing spit and precum down his length. 

“Fuck,” Caleb whispered, watching with wide eyes.  Molly was anything but gentle when he gripped his erection and started twisting his hand.  He rolled his head back and groaned, breath catching with every tug of his fist. 

Caleb was oddly mesmerized by the rings on Molly’s fingers, how they caught the light while they slipped and slid up and down the ridges that lined the underside of the tiefling’s cock.  

“You are extraordinary, Mollymauk,” Caleb said, his words dripping with a thicker accent. 

“Tell me more, darling,” Molly pleaded.  He bent his knees, dug his heels into the mattress and began thrusting upwards into his hand and causing the bed to shake.  Caleb bunched his hands in the blankets, holding on like it was his sanity. 

“You are a beautiful, terrible, filthy man,” Caleb growled.  “You certainly know how to put on a show.  And you are making me lose my damn mind.”

“I’m close,” Molly choked.  His thighs were shaking, his muscles tensing with the buildup of raw energy.  Caleb leaned down to kiss him, dipping his tongue past Molly’s lips and licking hungrily inside his mouth.  He looked between them, at the darkened head of Molly’s cock that was spilling precum onto Molly’s stomach, filling the divet of his bellybutton with its sticky mess. 

Caleb looked up, stared Molly in the eyes and grinned. 

“Stop,” Caleb ordered, and Molly froze.  “Take your hand away. Now.” 

Molly jerked his hand away as if he had been burned.  Caleb put a finger to Molly’s lips before he could ask the obvious question:  _ what’s wrong? _

“I want to make this last.  I want to control when you cum.” 

Caleb had never felt so powerful during an intimate moment than he did when Molly was unraveling so beautifully beneath him.  His head buzzed pleasantly and he could no longer think of a single reason why he would want to stop this other than to make the moment last forever. 

Molly keened, flexing his fingers and wiggling his hips impatiently.  Caleb chuckled, watching Molly’s cock bounce from side to side against his belly. 

“Gods, you’re terrific,” Molly said, reaching for Caleb with his clean hand.  Caleb nuzzled the palm and let Molly stroke his hair.  “Never thought you’d take charge like this, and I’m loving it, Caleb, but please, darling, please let me cum?”

“You are so polite tonight,” Caleb teased, kissing Molly’s palm.  “Go ahead.  Cum for me, Mollymauk.” 

Molly quickly returned to stroking himself.  He craned his neck, exposing a long stretch of skin that Caleb could not help but nibble on.  Caleb whispered obscenities into Molly’s ear, in Zemnian so that Molly could not understand but could figure out the general idea. 

“Come,” Caleb ordered one last time.  Molly came on cue, rising off the bed in a rigid arch.  Caleb sat up just in time to see Molly soil his chest and belly in thick spurts of cum.  Molly stroked himself through his climax, lowered himself back on the bed and finally went limp.  

Caleb rolled onto his side and propped his head up on his wrist.  He looked Molly over, scrutinizing the mess he had made.  He had heard of lovers enjoying the taste of each other’s cum.  He had read erotic stories where one person would lick the other’s skin clean after they were both spent.  But that sounded unpleasant to Caleb, who disliked the taste of precum and assumed that the rest of it would be just as foul.  Molly did not expect it of him either, which Caleb was grateful for. 

“Sorry,” Caleb mumbled.  “Was that enough?”

Molly shushed him before Caleb’s mind ran away with worry. 

“Don’t be ridiculous.  It was more than enough.  I was happy just to kiss you, but you were wonderful tonight.  Best orgasm I’ve had in a very long time.”

Caleb snorted.  “Bullshit.”

“No,” Molly shook his head firmly.  “No bullshit. Not this time.” 

Caleb sighed and flopped his head down.  Gods, how he wanted to believe Molly, but how?  How could Caleb compare to Molly’s past lovers when he could not even keep up in bed?  He wanted to hang onto every word, to patch himself a quilt with Molly’s kindness that he could wear like armor. 

They lied side by side in silence until Caleb dragged himself to the washroom to clean up the mess in his own underclothes.  He returned with a rag to wipe down Molly’s chest and climbed back into bed.  Molly held the covers up while Caleb curled against his side, and the two rearranged their limbs to fit together like a puzzle. 

Caleb rested his head against Molly’s chest, listening to his heartbeat slow.  He was overcome with gratitude to the universe for putting Mollymauk on this earth and to the fates that brought them together.  Caleb was not a sentimental man; love for him was something he had left behind in the destructive wake of his past.  But things were different with Molly, or at least they had the potential to be.  Caleb hoped that if Molly’s love for him was some kind of illusion, he could stay under its spell for a little while longer.  He barely heard his name over the rhythmic heartbeat and the emotion that had carried him far away from the four walls that surrounded them. 

“You’re enough, Caleb,” Molly said as Caleb drifted farther into the realm of sleep.  “I promise you, you’re enough.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to everyone who has left such wonderful comments on my recent fics. I adore this ship and writing them has filled my life with such joy. Thank you for letting me share it with you!

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to interpret Caleb as you'd like. I personally wrote this from an asexual perspective, but his sex aversion could also be a result of trauma. 
> 
> Also just assume that every fic I write will feature trans Caleb because it's come to a point where it's hard to picture him any other way, oops.


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